My dad could grow anything, I don’t have much luck and have pretty much given up. I would like to have some fresh tomatos and have tried to plant a few without much success. I even tried the Topsy Turvy as seen on TV, nada.
I gave up, now when I want fresh produce, I stop at the local farmers stand down the road and pay for it.
Recently I have come to believe that my failings as a tomato farmer is not my fault and the government owes me some restitution. You see, I have heard about a program that will give me $50,000 bucks to make up for my inadequacies.
The Attempted to Farm segment of the Pigford Vs Glickman of the USDA is the ticket. Some years ago there were maybe at the most 400 cases where the USDA is accused of turning down loans to black farmers out of a total of 18,000 black farmers in the nation. The plaintiffs were to receive 50 grand apiece. Hard to tell how many of the 400 farmers were discriminated against and how many should have been turned down because of credit problems or whatever, but the government agreed to pay off the 400. Ok, take the money and run, ahem says the lawyer Al Pires there are many more victims that need to be paid off. How about 86,000? He started a new class of victims by coming up with something called “Attempted to Farm”, if you were a minority and had thoughts about getting your hands in the soil and didn’t think the USDA would give you a fair shake, then put your hands out (after Al Pires takes his cut).
A senator who helped make this possible? Barrack Hussein Obama! Can you say reparations?
Now I make my case, I am 1/8th American Indian, I really think I could have made a go of my tomato farm in my backyard if only the USDA would have come here and given me a little support. I’m pretty distraught that my dreams of being a tomato farmer have been squashed by this evil country, but the 50 k would make me feel a little better.
What did I just say? Tomato, squashed, uhhh squashed tomatoes = ketchup !
I coulda been a ketchup mogul !
1 comment:
If you had gotten Dad's dark skin tone, by now you would have looked dark enough to qualify. I have not had to plant tomato plants in years because I continue to have the volunteer tomatoes in that tiny 1' by 4' patch of dirt by my garage. I never remember having any volunteer tomatoes when we were growing up.
And the funny part was the hundred of tomatoes he would start in February from seeds and he HATED tomatoes.
Never see or smell a tomato plant without thinking of Dad.
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