TRAVELING ABROAD FOR DUMMIES

Thursday me and some family members will be "traveling  abroad" to Italy.
Traveling abroad, I always wanted to say that. Sounds kinda snooty so I will not overuse that phrase. The thing about traveling abroad is they don't talk the way we do around here. They talk foreign talk over there. The thing is if talk regular American talk to them, you have to talk loud to the foreigners then they can usually understand you.
Now if you go down in the Mexico country which you don't have to traveling abroad to get down there, you go south until you get to a big fence or river and you wait till you see a bunch of Mexico people walking in a group and you just go the opposite way they're going till you are surrounded by foreign talkers.
Now the thing about Mexico talkers you not only have to speak your American talk loudly, you need to put an el before your American word and an O after the word. Let me example you, imagine if you will, your in a Mexico eating place and you want to try the local cwazine.

You can just say "hot tamale" and they will know tamale cause its a Mexico word and they're all hot so you don't need to convert the hot to Mexico speak.

But, and this is a big but! Say after you eat your hot tamale and it has a bad reaction in your nether regions you need to get to a bathroom fast!
Look your Mexico guy right in the eye and say loudly "whereO is the Elshitter!"
You don't need to convert the small America words to Mexico,  just the important big words. The little words is just fluff anyway.
Now when I go traveling abroad to the Italy place you can't use the O or the El.
When you talk Italy talk again you talk loudly to your Italy person and you just add an "a" to the end of your word and it converts it to an Italy word.  Now this is not an "a" like in caaake, it's an "a" like in faaaaart. You see the difference.
Like say you see a pretty Italy lady and you wish to make time with her, you say
"Ia havea mucha Viagra" And she will like you.
You see what I did there? In Italy talk you need to put the "a" after every American  word even the small not important words. Now the Viagra word doesn't need converted. It already has been converted for your convenience.
Ok that's enough for to day as you know I am traveling abroad soon and Ia havea mucha Viagra toa packa.





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